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Outside the Perfection, Into the Yellow (Free verse) by Sunny

I imagine being insane, inside white walls with no glow, but the resolution of minced cocaine smeared all over their stances- the ill brightness of a dentist's office that cuts off wind from the sky and the sky itself. A sour smell, glass door...raw and white, so white... Outside Spring has conquered all with poking poppies and lavender bushes that blot a naked blue background. The hummingbird with his velocity and the season of babies. A sun that winces at me in its natural light. Immortality melts in my mouth like sugar, as I ride the day slow with the sun to my west. Two magnolia trees and a mimosa- this is what I savor before the ivory bulbs shined up the cap of my head; I just had a colorful cat nap.

god'swife 22-Mar-06/9:17 PM
The ending kills this otherwise impressive poem. It's like watching two hours of a movie just to find in the end it was merely a dream, haha.

Is it the sun that winces or you?

There are some wonderful fresh images here, very original. Overall this poem is perfectly lovely.




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