LilMsLadyPoet31 Jan 2006

'from rigor mortis'...seems cumbersome, and felt yucky...maybe change? ..."in stiff repose" ..something with three syllabuls would fit better than four. (entire line would have 8)
I didn't understand:"Wasp hollowed coxes" . Is it refering to the tree you go on to speak about? should it be "wasp-hollowed coxes?
also."The same way I entered in a cot", I would rework that.