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This Is Me (Free verse) by PoeticXTC

This is me, I`m one of a kind. Brown, chinky eyes not easy to define. Shoulder length hair dark-brown and blonde Soft lips that speak truth; my word is bond. Beauty, smooth skin touched by none. A bright smile that could melt the sun. Sexy, tight frame not to be mistakened This gift is made for one, others are foresakened. Ivory key like teeth in two straight rows strong, neat from a slight correction Legs, muscular, like track stars Body, Built to perfection. Strong, working hands, worked to the bone. Pencil thin fingers most prized possession owned. Soft, cushy, tushy never missed by eyes. Surrounded by thick, ham like thighs. Never can be broken, standing tall and strong They envy such definition, seems nothing`s wrong Everyones view from the outside in Wanting what they don`t have, Forgetting envy is sin.

lmp 3-Jan-06/2:07 PM
there appear to be some conflicting descriptions here, about a tight compact frame and yet a soft cushy tushy. strong hands worked to the bone, yet they would undoubtedly be a bit work, cut, and scarred from hard work, and i don't get the idea that your vision of them is as such.
the part about the orthodonture work is refreshing; a part of the "perfection" that was coerced into existence rather than happening "naturally". the hint that there may be something wrong (last verse) is also good; very little is ever perfect inside and out.
and maybe the real substance of this work is in the last line. if i may offer: edit the desciption down a bit, but expand on the "view from the outside in" and the bit about sin.




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