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Lost Identity (Free verse) by TLRufener

I have sold myself To the critical masses. I hate it all As more and more time passes. I gave them my soul For poetic acceptance, I no longer write me Because I write their sentences. I have lost myself To a savage beast. I can’t run fast enough To escape their carnivorous feast. I allowed my life To be cast into a cage, And I can’t control The words on this page. I’ve read this before, Time and again; But I can’t seem to find Where this nightmare ends. They control all my action As I live this intricate lie; I’ve been so caught up That I can’t even cry. They ignore my pleas As I try to run, I can write no more Because my identity is gone.

Niphredil 17-Dec-05/6:12 AM
I find the rhythm a little bit stilted.
The well-defined rhythm of these four lines:
"I’ve read this before,
Time and again;
But I can’t seem to find
Where this nightmare ends."

doesn't quite seem to match the rather asymmetric last line of
"I have lost myself
To a savage beast.
I can’t run fast enough
To escape their carnivorous feast."

A little fixing-up would make the poem flow more smoothly, in my opinion.




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