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i remembered (Free verse) by skaskowski

gasp with greed, your flail, alike. a grasp of reeds, a subtle plight. banked on rubbly slipping sides, you raspy voiced, your cry, aside. your clenching fist, a muddled try. tanked, but flanked by harsh replies.

zodiac 18-Nov-05/10:32 PM
No comma after "greed"; no period after "plight"; no comma after "cry"; comma rather than period after "try".

Oddly good.




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