Replying to a comment on:

Drinking and driving (Free verse) by SILYLILGURL

EEEEEERRRRRRRKKKKKK CRASH! The sound of the car crashing into a brick wall That's the last minute of their lives That's how fast our life goes by. All the people died except The driver who was left to feel guilty from drinking and driving Always thinking How fast our lives go!

nentwined 24-May-05/7:12 PM
The onomotopeaia of the first line doesn't really work for me. Beyond that, this reads as the outline of a poem that covers tired ground, but could say it in an interesting manner.




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001