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afraid (Free verse) by hbhpoems

I feel afraid when all the abuse comes to my mind " He is whispering in my ear I have something on my body that is just like a lolliop The smell of Alchol is making me sick When I lick on his personal lolliop I taste a bitter Taste. It seems as it is happening now instead of the past " I am lying down on my bed as a theif in the night he enters my room." I am your cousin it is okay. 11 years old and knows that it is a lie. I try to push him off but he is much stronger then I am. A kiss on my lips stealing the little innocence I have lefted. " A little girl in a blue lacy dress. He is telling her that she is a cute thing. That is Why he touches her and kisses her. 5 years old and no where to turn she cries. He then gives her a doll to Play with" Now 23 years old and still afaid That he will repear again has a theif in the night

richa 30-Jun-04/12:14 PM
Afraid is a very weak impact word. You should try to avoid labelling emotions, use image to portray.

Also this could do with cutting down, make the reader think over the words rather than read through to get to the punch.

Spellcheck would not go amiss.




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