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The daisy-chain girl (Free verse) by richa

The length of a daisy chain is no measure, we are not in ancient rome, one must do like us to live in the orchard-- 'shake the low branches till apples are dropped and buckets are full and stalks are to be re-hung with new fruit' 'or one's knotted daisies'.

david 11-Jun-04/10:54 AM
Lyrically, I have no problem. The language is tightly-wound and it sounds good. The issue I take, though, is more typographical in nature. The enjambment of the lines and that punctuation aren't doing anything for me, and I find it a little distracting to the point where it's detracting from my enjoyment of the piece.




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