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Suicide of the Ego (Free verse) by Drifting Shadow

Every day of the life you have walked, Has lead you to this step of steps, To step into the abyss, The abyss of nothing. It looks dark in there, It looks light out here, but it is as it is, and it is the same. For the years of fear and pain, Hanging on by your fingernails, Thinking, wanting, trying… To die. When all along you knew you couldn’t. Who would of thought? That now you have seen your worth, Now you have seen your potential, And you have decided to live, That the only way to do that is death, Not for your body, Kill your ego, See nothing, But truly see it. Be nobody, And grow again what did not wither. You fear what you will see, When you step into the abyss. You fear what you will see, When you step out of the abyss. But that fear has been outgrown, By the fear of the world you created.

zodiac 31-May-04/4:45 AM
You colossal boob! (black fog: "Look! I'm pressing your buttons again!" zodiac: "Shut the fuck up.")

For one thing, my life is so intensely happy it actually makes me wonder ALL THE TIME what's up with all these people talking about 'the path to happiness' and such bullshit. How can they be so incredibly wrongheaded as to not already have a life that's as happy as the one I have without even trying? So, no, I HAVE NO QUESTIONS. YOU HAVE NOTHING YOU CAN TEACH ME. If I changed anything about my life, it could only make it less happy than it currently is, you see? Even now, when you think I'm agonizing over your pinpoint-accurate reading of me, I am quietly, beatifically happy. Naturally, lacking anything which even roughly approximates an awareness of irony and humor, you are not going to believe me. Go take a flying leap into a wall. I am most certainly not really my poemranker self.

And for another thing, "you can go away now zodiac, we have no further interest in you" and "So go on....tell them that you won...when you could have taken something for your mind from here, so in fact you have lost" are my jokes from May 29, only made much, much more dumb.

(black fog: "That's because I'm a master of manipulation." zodiac: "If you were an utter retarded instead of such a 'master of manipulation,' would it make your retarded poemranker rambles in any wise different?" Everyone: "No.")

If the Joe-joe model of 'discourse' (ie, repeating others' lines a few days later, adopting some fake fatherly condescension, changing the subject frequently, assuming without justification or proof that you've "won" already) is the best you have - well, you will, of course, still die of natural causes at a ripe old age with your wife and beautiful children at your side after having been as happy as anyone else (except me) most of that time, but you will also have been a blissfully ignorant retarded for nearly a century and let me tell you something: When on that great gettin'-up morning the Lord Jesus separates the Retardeds from the Non-Retardeds and invites the Non-Retardeds to come to him an nuzzle in his clean clove-smelling beard, WE WILL SEE WHO'S LAUGHING!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!11!!1!1!!!1!!!!!!1!

Oh God, I've soiled myself again...




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