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Suicide of the Ego (Free verse) by Drifting Shadow

Every day of the life you have walked, Has lead you to this step of steps, To step into the abyss, The abyss of nothing. It looks dark in there, It looks light out here, but it is as it is, and it is the same. For the years of fear and pain, Hanging on by your fingernails, Thinking, wanting, trying… To die. When all along you knew you couldn’t. Who would of thought? That now you have seen your worth, Now you have seen your potential, And you have decided to live, That the only way to do that is death, Not for your body, Kill your ego, See nothing, But truly see it. Be nobody, And grow again what did not wither. You fear what you will see, When you step into the abyss. You fear what you will see, When you step out of the abyss. But that fear has been outgrown, By the fear of the world you created.

Starsigh 31-May-04/4:12 AM
God’s wife, hope you feel better after you’re rant.
Ok I’ll cut the brainwashing here...but remember this...anyone who gets brainwashed makes that choice...zodiac made the choice to keep coming back here...I may have thrown a little manipulation in but it is still a choice. And I doubt it brainwashed him anyway, I thought I was pretty easy going on him.
You say that I am self centred but I do this stuff out of empathy because like yourself...I really know what it is to suffer, I’m not going into details of my past but I will say that I been through 3 metal illnesses, drug addiction and alcoholism...can you imagine the sort of crap I went through to drive me to that...and the further crap that it brought into my life?
This stuff was the only way out for me, so in a way there is a part of me in the poem.
If your brains and feelings are turned to shit through life then what better way to get yourself through it than brainwashing yourself? That’s my attitude towards the brainwashing deal, it is not nothing that you get out of it is just the nothing that you find within.
Your psychic abilities jump through the roof and you can see so much more than before but before you can do that, you have to accept that you know nothing...and no, I aint some religious nut, I don’t follow any religions or cults. I just follow what I find inside myself. And learn.
As for being self centred that is exactly what we all are if we are honest...even those who go around helping others...they are only doing it because it feels good to them or makes them feel more righteous than others in some way.
A bit like you replying so that you could tell yourself that you are better than me...when I never think that...everyone is equal, so where is the egotism? I offer something to share and learn from others also...where is the egotism?

Yes this is poem ranker and people didn’t understand my poem...so I tried to show them what I did to myself.
You been alive for a long time, but my spirit has been down here for thousands of years I have but 2 lifetimes left down here...attack that if you will but that is also more I found within.
Ego isn’t the best word to use for what is disintegrated...but the only one close... the trouble with language is that there is so much that words cannot explain.
I am not sorry that you been through all you have, as I’m sure your not sorry about it either.




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