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More sex like applesauce (Free verse) by Lord Ganus
The foreman gave Mick the address of the Modern Continental building,
along with directions on how you âget theah from heahâ. Modern
Continental is the construction firm that is in charge of the Big Dig,
and its offices are near Boston harbor, one block away from the Aquarium
stop on the blue line.
The president of Modern Continental is a man named Les Marino. Les
Marino is obsessed with healthy living, and he runs a well regarded
Italian restaurant in Cambridge called Marinoâs. All the fruits and
vegetables served at Marinoâs are grown on Les Marinoâs very own
farmlands in Newton. In the morning, after eating breakfast and working
out, Les Marino can often be found inspecting his fields. He, for the
most part, lets Modern Continental run itself, while he lives simply and
peacefully on the profits. The billions of dollars in budget overruns
that Modern Continental has incurred over the course of the Big Dig
could be attributed, in part, to the fact the Modern Continentalâs
president is at a stage in life where nothing matters to him more than
the quality of the fruit dangling from his orchard branches.
When Mick walked up the steps into the late-afternoon sunlight he had no
trouble finding the Modern Continental offices, which he approached with
a brisk pace. He went up to the sixth floor â human resources - and
talked to Trish.
âHello there! I am here toâ¦â
âYouâre Mick, the giraffe, right?â, Trish interrupted.
Mick looked around to see if there were any other giraffes in the human
resources office.
âI sure am!â
The rest of this dialog was pretty straightforward, much like that which
occurred between Jet and the receptionist mentioned earlier, at the
Genzyme office. Suffice it to say that Mick got the job as a crane, with
full benefits and excellent pay, and for this reason felt like he was
finally making something of himself as he stepped out of the elevator,
rakishly unbent his neck and set out home.
Mick didnât actually feel like going home â he felt too good to feel
like going somewhere so charmlessly specific. But it was there he was
headed, having no other place to go, and so, Mick walked through the
turnstile at the Aquarium station and stood on the inbound platform.
There he noticed a penguin struggling beside him, trying to put her
briefcase on top of the turnstile. She needed both flippers to retrieve
a token from her purse, which she then placed in her beak. Lifting
herself up with her flippers, she positioned the token above its slot
and dropped it in. She retrieved her briefcase, and walking through the
turnstile sighing, saw Mick looking at her queerly.
As she half expected the giraffe to say something to her:
âWhat kind of animal are you?â he asked, curiously.
âI am a penguin.â
âWhatâs that?â
The penguin raised an eyebrow. If she hadnât thought his ignorance
completely sincere she wouldnât have continued. But she did, and so
said:
âA penguin is a type of bird. I come from Antarctica.â
Mick tilted his head and bent his neck down, smiling, to the supposed
bird, to get a closer look. It was then he first noticed the fine
feathers on her flippers, shaped like kippers. He tried to understand
her petite, delicate bone structure, palliated with blubber, mysterious,
compact. He saw her beak. She was clearly a type of bird, but to him
something to him seemed amiss.
âWhen you approached the turnstile, why didnât you simply fly above
it? Were you injured in a war with another tribe? Were you struck down
with a spear?â
The âPenguinâ laughed.
âNo war, no. We penguins cannot fly â we swim around and eat the
fish we find under the water. Thatâs the reason you only see us in
cities. Since we cannot get jobs as crop dusters we are forced to work
in offices. I work at the aquarium.â
Mick unbent his neck and prepared to crack wise â for some reason he
felt unusually able to be witty.
âIt must be hard to resist the temptation to eat your exhibits!â
She again laughed, this time more out of charity more than anything else.
The penguin and the giraffe heard the train coming, and so knowing that
its noise would soon be too loud to talk over, stood silently, each
looking at the ground to the left of the other. Together they boarded,
small-talking during the lulls of silence while the train stopped,
traveling in two minute long spurts under the financial district to the
green line, where they then transferred together, eventually parting
ways at Park Street, her living on Beacon hill and he living all the way
down to Central square on the red line.
(add content about how Mick feels more at ease more unusually able to be
witty)
(what is it like to say a girlâs/boyâs name in bed when you first
meet them)
(national geographic â fashion magazine in which he sees pictures of a
comparable short animal such as groundhogs)
(brother was afraid of the short creatures)
(brother hated bending neck down to talk)
(have him âsweep her off her feetâ with hilariously obvious
symbolism)
(have her say something like she felt like she was flying)
The reader must understand that Mick met this penguin at a pivotal
period in his life, when what was once foreign and unsettling had then
become comfortable and if anything, delightfully exotic. For every bit
that he could have felt like a stranger in a strange land, Mick felt
like a distinguished and well-informed tourist in a cheerful city, and
this filled his heart with what, for lack of a better term, we can call
love. He had it inside of him, in huge bags and boxes and buckets, in
big pieces and in gaseous clouds, and with it he painted every wall,
fragranced every expiration and shone onto each person that his eyes
fell upon.
If we get married, her name would become Angie Toynbee. That has an
agreeable ring to it.
Mick had learned, when they parted, that her name was Angie. Angie the
penguin.
I sure am grateful to have such a distinguished surname. If whoever gave
it to me were right here I would shake their hand and say âthank you
kindly!â
The question we must now ask is this: was Mick at this point struck with
love for Angie the penguin? Had his eye become keenly set upon this
flower of the Antarctic, whom he had only known for a few minutes? It is
very difficult to say. But it is likely. When Mick got home he walked to
his room, stood on the threshold and from there threw his backpack onto
his bed, thinking it unlikely that he had anything fragile in his bag,
or perhaps simply not caring to remember if that was the case. He headed
back out the door.
For dinner he took the red line to Harvard yard, thinking it likely that
there would be a tree there to sup on. He was right, and it is likely
that as he nibbled with neck outstretched on the branches of a mighty
oak, he was thinking about more than his dinner, or how silly he thought
it was that the scholars passing below him never walked under his legs,
for fear of it bringing bad luck, or so he would have thought, had he
thought this. But it is not likely that he did. It is considerably more
probable that he was thinking about Angie. If this is the case, it is
extremely likely that as he walked with the sun setting at his back
towards his apartment, he continued to do so.
He wondered if, at work the next morning, if he craned his neck up high
enough, he could perhaps see this âPenguinâ waddle to work. If he
did see her, he wondered what his chances of his catching her eye were.
He knew that it was highly unlikely, of course; but it is just as
unlikely that anyone could have, at this point in time, convinced him
otherwise.
The substance of what Mick knew of Angie was scant, but it was enriched
by his imagination. He learned that Angie worked at the aquarium, which
was only a block away from where Mick had that day had his interview at
Modern Continental. She was one of two principals who ran the aquarium.
The other principal, a polar bear named Pedro, handled the business of
the organization, tending its connections to the world, while she was
more concerned with the education of the public and the morale of her
staff. She used to work at the Guggenheim in New York, but decided that
she preferred working at the Aquarium with fish to working in New York
with paintings, if for no other reason than because at the Aquarium she
was amongst her people. Even if she could only talk to them before and
after business hours, her interaction with the other penguins in their
dressing room was the highlight of her day.
âBy now youâve all met Candy. Today is her first day, Iâm sure
youâll all do your best to make her feel welcome.â
The girls brush their feathers, nodding and smiling at Angie in their
mirrors.
âNow Trixie, are you planning to lay around on the small rock all day
again?â
âNo Miss, I feel great today and will swim around a bit.â
âWonderful. By the way, everybody, the fish man will be coming late
today, so be sure to try to hide your disappointment. Perhaps instead of
pretending to not be hungry, we could dispense with the guilt trip. Or
hereâs an idea - why not act even more enthusiastic about being fed?â
Yes Angie!
The penguins, in chorus, responded, each looking at her reflection in
the mirrors around the room that they were using to apply lipstick,
mascara, or if they had arrived late, a hurried layer of pale penguin
foundation around their beaks. When they have all finished their makeup,
they walk to the center of the room to receive their instructions from
their acting coach:
âLetâs get this show on the road, shall we!?â
Craig Fairchild, a garter snake, is the only male allowed in the
dressing room. He holds a clipboard and a pen. Every morning he goes
over the roles each would be playing throughout the day.
âListen up!â
Craigâs job was to maintain the fantasy that his audience already had
about penguins â that they were all playful, that they loved nothing
more than swimming and squawking and that they lived their lives
unburdened by burden, or, put more simply, happy. He preached to the
girls every morning about how they had to believe in this fantasy for it
to be believable, and with this he had considerable success: he had
observed that his performers were playing the roles that they had been
assigned for the work day before it started and after it ended, and that,
furthermore, their lives outside of work seemed every bit as blissful
as their audience imagined it was as they worked.
âTrixie, you will be swimming for most of the day. Maybe you could try
doing a backflip every once in a while?â
Trixie bubbles: âIâve been practicing at home in my bath!â
âFabulous! Josephine, I was wondering if you and Sandy couldnât
maybe pretend to play hopscotch on the fifth rock today?â
In unison: âWhatever you say Craig!â
âRaven, Robin, Kandice, keep on doing what youâre doing!â
More nodding, grinning. The girls are excited, or as they would say,
psyched, which is to say, totally stoked.
Angie notes that the clock in the dressing room has struck ten: Showtime.
âGood luck girls!â
Thanks Ms. A!
Angie walks over to the new girl, puts her wing on hers.
âIf you have any questions, just ask one of your sisters here.â
I sure thank you, Miss!
âPlease, call me Angie.â
Candy follows the rest of the girls through the door that leads to the
penguin pool.
Angie turns and takes the door leading out to the ramp.
The New England Aquarium was designed by the Cambridge 7, a firm founded
by Serge Ivan Chermayeff and six other people around 1970. Being an
architectural practice in the 1970s it is exceedingly likely that their
staff had several men with beards, perhaps even bearded Italians. Their
offices occupy the top two floors of a building on Massachusetts Avenue
that is equidistant from Harvard square and Central square. They are
world specialists in the design of aquariums.
In the 1930s, Chermayeff was one of the foremost proponents of the
International style in Britain, and later in the United States. It is in
this manner that the New England Aquarium was designed. Oh, you might
not think so looking at from the front. But Frank Gehryâs newly added
façade, like the vast darkness inside, cannot hide the true nature of
this monster.
The impression one has after visiting the New England Aquarium is that
all the fish in the fucking world couldnât make up for the remoteness,
the claustrophobic loftiness of the building inside. Truly experiencing
the New England Aquarium is like paying Walter Gropius to let you walk
around in his throat while he drinks two-hundred euro bottles of Gewü
rztraminer. Now, this simile makes more sense if one keeps in mind that
Walter Gropius was a utter bastard. His only saving grace is his
irrelevance today - his whitest designs now stand unwanted and rust-
stained all over suburban Germany.
To tour the New England Aquarium, one must walk up a ramp that spirals
around a plexiglass cylinder, the largest saltwater tank in the world,
for about 4 storeys, in complete darkness, until you get to the top,
where you then take another ramp down, unless you are trying to get to
Angieâs top floor office, the door of which she has hidden with a
large matte black painted panel, so as not to distract the guests from
the undersea fantasy world that they paid 15 dollars apiece to see.
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