(PART THE 1ST - SIC TRANSIT GLORIA BRITANNICAE) What a sad degraded world it is we live in: Violent, adulterous, hypocritical slobs Masquerading as cabinet ministers TV entertainers and footballers; And that's just the half of it. The once noble and respected BBC (slogan: nation shall speak peace unto nation) Now employs a load of talentless, provincial announcers Complete with impenetrable provincial accents Spouting banalities and half-truths. I remember a golden age, (ah! halycon days) When BBC announcers spoke decent English; When announcers wore evening dress to read the News; To show respect for the paying viewers; When "Arts programmes" didn't mean include graffito daubers Burbled on about boringly by Yorkshire pseudo-intellectuals; When you needed to be almost literate Before even being allowed to swab out the lavs. And now of course, in freedom's name, Everyone can go to a so-called university (Walton-on-the-Naze Polytechnic University Of Football Management is particularly good) Provided you can half-spell your own name (second attempt will do), And as long as you can pay the bills; And the average person's fondest dream Is to win Big Brother or Tuneless Teen Idol. Sic transit gloria Britannicae. (PART THE 2ND – SIC TRANSIT GLORIA AMERICANAE) What a sad degraded world it is we live in: Violent, adulterous, hypocritical cruds Masquerading as celebrities, Hollywood heroes, TV entertainers and basketball studs; And that's just the half of it. The once noble and respected USA (slogan: e pluribus unum, not that anyone Would ever have worked that one out, not spotting 13 letters = 13 states, mainly because they can’t count that high) Now is ruled by a load of criminal neo-cons Complete with impenetrable regional drawls Spouting banalities and half-truths (if you’re lucky - they’re mostly blatant lies). I remember a golden age, (ah! halycon days) When the rest of the world liked Americans And when American naivety was forgiven as being charming And innocent and indicative of goodness. But no longer. Now America is hated. Except for the Israelis (but everyone hates them – they even hate themselves). And how about TV? Once there was a day when anchormen Assumed their audiences might have a brain But nowadays? You’d be lucky to find a TV show With the intellectual content of the 50s Perry Como hour. And now of course, in freedom's name, Everyone can go to a so-called college or university As long as you’re from a PC-approved minority And can play basketball like holy fuck (the OC Simpson Campus Technical University of Baseball Management, Assisted Homicide and Public Bathroom Maintenance is mighty fine for prime-time retards I do hear, yee ha), Provided you can half-spell your own last name (second attempt will do), And as long as your Daddy can pay the bills; And the average person's fondest dream Is to win Big Brother or Fantasy Island And to have sex with Jerry Springer’s half-caste sister. Sic transit gloria Americanae.