I have no idea about how he got there Or how long he's going to stay But Neil Simon's living in my lunula Where he sleeps all night and writes all day I try to coax him off my hand Sometimes I act the jerk Sometimes he makes queer faces at me Sometimes I yell It doesn't work We discuss sports and recent weather I've grown to like him a little more He brings some friends over here and there They make a mess I cannot seem to stay asleep now They always bring the noise I picked up Neil just yesterday And took him from his boys "Neil", I said with such a shout "Look at all you do to me." "I'll have you know this cannot continue" "You friends must go" "They must let me be" So Neil just sat and looked Then he gathered up his things And Neil moved up into my brain Where he lives to make me laugh and sing