suicidal thoughts sometimes come in my head but then I remember a few words I heard said life is precious and death is painful shes in heaven and Id be in hell I think these things and noone will ever know but if it was my turn I would want to go I thought of every posibility of why but the answers dont come and I start to cry it was not her time to be gone she still had so many days to be done she had a lifetime of songs to be sung and her way still to be won it feels like I have lost part of my life cut out deep with a sharp knife I hate the endless pain it has made me begin to become vain!