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Everyone's choosing sides (Free verse) by zodiac
There’s that hint of smoke in the air again, sharp-smelling as memory, a crackling autumn-woods feeling that gets my hackles shimmying like gasoline, like American flags in our Nixon childhoods, witch burning Halloweens, pitch- forks and torches bustling and chimeric in their own fugitive twilight. Seems the center’s feeling the squeeze lately: lines are drawn; in the trees rustling flame-colored around the square I can see how nature is drawn inevitably to extremes – not without a kind of sadness, for autumn’s fine as any middle thing; and I’d remain here longer if I could, with the tang of wet-leaf-burning coloring my dreams, and want only an inch left here to hang myself by my equivocating spine.

Up the ladder: A Love Potion
Down the ladder: Indiscrete

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Arithmetic Mean: 9.333333
Weighted score: 7.1666665
Overall Rank: 14
Posted: February 22, 2004 6:00 PM PST; Last modified: February 22, 2004 6:19 PM PST
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Comments:
[9] Shuushin @ 207.5.211.177 | 22-Feb-04/6:49 PM | Reply
Sides? Who's choosing??

Cat Fight!!

Some good language in this.
[10] Lenore @ 64.252.98.210 | 22-Feb-04/6:58 PM | Reply
Slightly left of center myself.
This is dead on! 10
[9] richa @ 81.178.228.199 | 24-Feb-04/2:25 PM | Reply
A nice rush-like quality to this. And a good combination of image and narrative.

Not sure about sharp smelling as memory. Do you really mean that memory is sharp smelling?

Also wet leaves do not really burn.
[9] edpeterson @ 68.79.14.47 | 12-Apr-04/8:16 AM | Reply
Excellent piece.
363 view(s)




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