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Sunset Cycle (Free verse) by Jsylum
I was born to wonder when and why the morning sun was to set and rise; Did light leave darkness far behind only to drop behind the mountains, and recline? Rechained now I am to wandering free in the haunting memories of the years of stories gone by before and after me as the closing darkness nears. I was born to wonder how there was light before this darkness now and I was born to wonder where such mellow melodies are sung, that are seemingly close, yet nowhere near envisioned by full-throated thrushes on the darkling plains whence sorrows come whispering hope as tomorrow rushes here. I was born to sing again such songs that would turn around the setting star, the settling wind to turn the deepening darkness in; the verse that rhymes, and would begin but never end, to let our words resound through all our experiences and spin together one tale by which we all are bound. I was born to go beyond what boundaries light has set wandering out onto the lightless steps to ask, to touch, lest I forget and return to remember and recall poetic gloom, love's hopes and fears, legends made real behind closed walls, of one man's dreams, and all men's tears. I was made to taste the wine, that poesy rhyme, that leaves me fainting for more intoxicating dreams to find, to seek out what would captivate our minds from the light I sensed there beyond the soul, in the sun's rising, in fires captured in the snow like sunlight broken into a million rays in wisdom scattered into glistening gold.

Up the ladder: Tainted Sky
Down the ladder: Sense of Peace

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Arithmetic Mean: 5.8
Weighted score: 5.095362
Overall Rank: 6070
Posted: August 1, 2002 4:11 AM PDT; Last modified: August 1, 2002 4:11 AM PDT
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Comments:
[5] Christof @ 195.172.133.226 | 23-Aug-02/4:19 AM | Reply
Is that a reference to Thomas Hardy an Matthew Arnold in the second verse? Because you seem to have bought into the whole Arnold 'scholar gipsy' gig - wandering beyond limits, looking at the failings of the world from afar etc. I think though that you need to cut down on the number of words used. This sounds very 19th century.
[n/a] <~> @ 167.206.181.179 | 23-Aug-02/7:35 AM | Reply
i like the imagery and ideas expressed, but feel like it would sing with a little editing. work on the last 2 lines a little more? they are not strong enough to close what you have opened.
[7] Fearlesfan_04 @ 129.66.1.202 | 24-Feb-05/7:00 PM | Reply
Beautiful imagery..
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