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yo (Free verse) by bxjay170
My soul's flying with the wind looking for a place to lay am waking up and still seeing the same day life's getting hard should i go or stay? do you understand what am trying to say? My neighborhood is full with cracks yet no roses grow from them Looking to exit this life and into the real world Am here sittin in a high school class room and i dont even know why am here wish i could disapier show no fear my life has musical sounds but can u hear If u where am from this u will know and feel

Up the ladder: psudobackstabber
Down the ladder: No Easy Way To Be Free

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
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Arithmetic Mean: 2.3333333
Weighted score: 4.6821256
Overall Rank: 12128
Posted: April 9, 2003 9:55 AM PDT; Last modified: April 9, 2003 9:55 AM PDT
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Comments:
[7] Ranger @ 213.120.56.37 | 9-Apr-03/11:19 AM | Reply
Let the last two lines go, I don't think they really fit in with the rest. I know this sounds really shitty of me, but check the spelling a bit more, it just makes it easier for the reader.
Aside from that I love this but I would like to see more. Redraft it if you will, and I'll have another look. I think it's worth a seven. I'm in that kind of mood.
[n/a] <~> @ 167.206.181.179 | 9-Apr-03/12:42 PM | Reply
bx--it's too bad you don't care. you express thoughts that so many are feeling, but you don't care enough about saying it to communicate it well. if you want some recognition, run spell check. it shows no respect for yourself or your audience to be so sloppy.
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