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remnants (Free verse) by crin carve into this niche
wait for the stitches
to dissolve
solve this mystery
of remnants
and scraps of memory
turn the tables
turn me on
the knives we held
make such noise
as they drop
to the floor
scar tissue
the issues we had
with one another
slowly fading
slowly healing
now we're feeling
for something more
the loss was minimal
it would be criminal
to deny this
once we were frightened
but we shouldn't fight it
i never dreamed i'd find this
in you
but when i wasn't looking
you turned into
the most pleasant of surprises
Up the ladder:
If I'd Never
Down the ladder:
cool hand luke
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.3333335
Posted: October 15, 2002 7:03 PM PDT; Last modified: October 15, 2002 7:03 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.3585887 Overall Rank: 3295 Comments:
[7]
Christof @ 195.172.133.226
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16-Oct-02/2:31 AM
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Reply
I quite like the internal rhymes you use. The progression of the poem is somewhat mysterious, but perhaps that is fitting as it ends in a surprise (but is 'pleasant' too weak a word?)
The sutures are unravelling that hold this thing together.
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