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Free to Not Know Me (Free verse) by jsab78
Allow your mind and set it free, Let yourself loose inside of me, You want my body, but you don't know me, Feel my vibe by trying to see the velour skies that I see, You see what I project, Never knowing what I protect, Thinking hard when I come home, Respect the shell I call my body because I'm cool and I tend to stand alone, I let you inside this case which holds my soul, There is no story if I do this now, nothing to be told, Touch me, Taste my skin and make me wet, I know you feel that vibe as well as your lips inch closer to my breasts, No, not yet... Call me a tease, I think you should wait until you see, if I can look at you and set myself free, My body is begging me to just as much as you are, Don't misunderstand, the urges I have, they are the same ones that got you this far, I look at you and know what you're about, Don't try to one night stand me, I dare you to to try, you don't know me, What could happen between two people? When they let themselves be free?

Up the ladder: "Huh?...What?"
Down the ladder: #10

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.7
Weighted score: 5.35
Overall Rank: 3392
Posted: October 5, 2002 1:39 PM PDT; Last modified: October 5, 2002 1:39 PM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 131.111.212.215 | 13-Oct-02/2:14 PM | Reply
I don't know. Maybe they'd have it off?
[n/a] jsab78 @ 205.188.208.42 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 13-Oct-02/2:34 PM | Reply
maybe some wrank teenager will read it and like it. maybe some crusty depressed person will read this and have no actual criticism to make on other people's work so he or she will just write bitter angry comments. I'm not offended by criticism, I beg for it,but make it constructive not malicious. Dark Angel? Angel of Death? Maybe you should off yourself!
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 131.111.212.215 > jsab78 | 14-Oct-02/2:35 AM | Reply
LOL GOOD ONE! I will thank you, Madam, to address me as "-=Dark_Angel=-" in future.
[8] debased @ 24.43.45.89 | 26-Oct-02/7:36 PM | Reply
its different 8
[3] -=SeTTle=- @ 140.186.49.69 | 27-Oct-02/7:05 PM | Reply
Rhyme very forced. Make it mean something or don't rhyme.
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