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Pandora's Box (Free verse) by PoeticXTC
A box within a box, within a box Shallow, hollow, empty box, Or is it? Like building blocks Of stone; of steel Anger, frustration Collecting within Forming a great wall. A wall of ravaging anger Thrusting, pounding, raging To be set free. Set free from cementations of feelings Clusters and clusters, Of regrets, next hatred, next to lust and greed Wanting to be the best Beat all the rest, Longing to be number ONE. But this wall; this wall Of ungratefulness, un-peacefulness Shields any such victory from being reality. Such a hollow, fragile box Tightly packed, shelled in tight With a golden lock and key. Who bares such a key? The key to set me free Free of the emotion Free of the emptiness. Who bares such a power? The power to unlock this golden lock With that golden key To knock down this wall and set me free To open this box, Within a box, within a box This shallow, hollow empty box Or is it?

Up the ladder: Shoestring Salutation

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.75
Weighted score: 5.2086053
Overall Rank: 4491
Posted: December 20, 2005 7:04 PM PST; Last modified: December 20, 2005 7:04 PM PST
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Comments:
[7] cyan9 @ 217.40.63.105 | 21-Dec-05/3:35 AM | Reply
1st verse is very good, conveys the anger/power well. 2nd verse fades off a bit and is less coherent.
[n/a] PoeticXTC @ 137.139.192.89 > cyan9 | 21-Dec-05/12:53 PM | Reply
Thank You, Cyan9. I purposely did that so that the end could be strong and the reader could feel a change in power. I didn't want the middle stanzas to be too strong so that it overwhelmed the end feeling I am trying to get out of the readers.
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