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The Fall of Marvin Hyde (Free verse) by cyan9
In the beginning there was emptiness, there was void. To achieve fruitful existence I reached into the pool; The ripples emanated as the goals and desires of others, Their aspirations seemed a natural and good course for me. I came to believe that the happy peoples direction saved them, Whilst mine lead me into a deep dark hole where I existed as nothing. I yearned to be those things that others rejoiced and held high, I yearned to be popular, to be cool, to be accepted and belong. As I began to find my goals unattainable, Began to accept my fate, My inability to integrate, My inability to satiate myself, I fell into the earth, Becoming learned in the art and salvation of hating me. I longed for understanding and sympathy, and received nothing but spit. I lay up at nights turning from side to side, Drowning in my sweat. The only thing that appeared to help was sorrow, Was tears. I began to create a world for myself, A world where everyone died. Any dream that I could forge of pain, Anything would do. I began to use my world, Learning to lie for an empathetic burst, I began to crave pain like a junkie and his syringe, I had created a voice for me, a new being within my head, I had created hope for me in this darkest of places. I give you Dr Herbert Cyan. <Footnote:- This piece is to be read side by side with "The Rise of Dr Herbert Cyan" in order to introduce the series of poems that this begins (the rest will be put up later, depending on who likes this one)>

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Weighted score: 4.9525743
Overall Rank: 8879
Posted: November 17, 2005 7:35 AM PST; Last modified: November 20, 2005 2:55 PM PST
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Comments:
[8] Dovina @ 209.247.222.98 | 20-Nov-05/4:58 PM | Reply
Maybe the ficticious Herbert Cyan is more real than Marvyn Hyde. The parallel poem is not up so I can't say, only that what I used to see as the ficticious Dovina is becoming more real every day. She'll pop into life some day and stab a knife into _____.
[n/a] cyan9 @ 217.40.63.105 > Dovina | 23-Nov-05/8:15 AM | Reply
It'll be like the film how to get a head in advertising, she'll appear as a boil in your neck that you try to lance, but winds up growing into a new head that lances you and buries your head as a boil in your neck..... or maybe not.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 | 21-Nov-05/12:08 AM | Reply
This may be assuming too much and it's certainly none of my business but have you kicked the habit? I'm guessing yes. There's just as good a chance this is completely fictional and based on nothing in your life but heroin's a fucked up drug don't you think?
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 > ALChemy | 21-Nov-05/12:14 AM | Reply
<Footnote:- Don't worry about who likes it or doesn't, post it. You need to get feedback (good or bad) on any of your work that you think has potential. Personally I'm really interested to see where you're going to take this.
[n/a] cyan9 @ 217.40.63.105 > ALChemy | 23-Nov-05/8:09 AM | Reply
This piece is a exaggeration of a period in my life well prior to taking any drugs, I don't take any now either. Heroin addicts are 'fucked up' people; having seen what Ive seen, I blame the reasons for them being 'fucked up' rather than the drug that can provide benefit to generally the terminally ill.
[n/a] cyan9 @ 217.40.63.105 > ALChemy | 23-Nov-05/8:12 AM | Reply
The line about the junkie and his syringe has little to do with herion, and more to do with a state of craving pain. + I have taken many substances and been temporarily hooked on a few, but not heroin.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 > cyan9 | 23-Nov-05/10:26 AM | Reply
I see. The body creates it's own highly addictive drugs and this can usually be sited as a main factor in why people will do things that make them appear to be on synthetic drugs. I'm glad to hear that this is coming from a sober mind. Somehow it seems to make the poem better knowing that.
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