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Remember me she said (Free verse) by Caducus
You became the quarrel of crows My quarrel was with God Silent as the rose That fell with my tears From oval tombs To your plywood bed. Plastic expressions With plastic wreaths Your Father carries you For the first time and last, And our honest baby cried For milk and dust By weeping crocodiles Impatient for the buffet. Remember me she said Remember me she said But I want to forget you Yet God doesn’t let you And all my life I remember you dead. Remember me she said Remember she said In October when you tread With leaves I lay now dead Remember me she said Remember me she said But you always haunt me In bare oaks that taunt me As I walk upon the dead, I remember what you said And lay a rose upon your bed. The crows have gone And God has won You fell from life Yet rised as sun, And I remember I remember You lived in me When you died in December

Down the ladder: Geese

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.8
Weighted score: 5.2145653
Overall Rank: 4391
Posted: October 27, 2005 6:29 AM PDT; Last modified: October 27, 2005 6:29 AM PDT
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Comments:
[9] vulcan @ 80.242.8.17 | 27-Oct-05/9:36 AM | Reply
beautiful one
[9] Dovina @ 209.247.222.84 | 27-Oct-05/8:30 PM | Reply
Very tender, especially the "honest baby" lines.
[8] Niphredil @ 192.117.121.115 | 28-Oct-05/10:11 AM | Reply
rised = rose.
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