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Grasping Smoke (Free verse) by Luzr
Cry and be done with it, damn it Holding onto smoke is tricky Of course the vacuum of mind, Would manage to get it perfect Sealed tight in pockets Lined with gray matter and glass Exhale and remember how to breathe, damn it Before you choke tonight Holding onto smoke Mirrors should sing the sonnets Of reckless pipe dreams Buried beneath practiced smiles Steady your shaking hands, damn it You knew you couldn't hold this Desperate, you've forgotten that this burns Even with time machines and what you know now You wouldn't last a minute, look in a mirror Clutching onto smoke, has worn you down Close your eyes and rest for once, damn it The dark bags telling of your slow decay You look like you've returned from a fist fight A little worse for wear, I pray it was to the death Because otherwise, I'd never believe That you got the other guy at all Let go and lay down, damn it You had it and you lost it Nothing more to tell, so give it a rest Light up a cancer, and lean back Relax damn it, you've lost Smoke wasn't meant to be held

Up the ladder: Dying breed
Down the ladder: C. Morgenstern: The Surf

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
10  .. 21
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.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 7.5
Weighted score: 5.2980075
Overall Rank: 3641
Posted: April 12, 2005 9:01 AM PDT; Last modified: April 12, 2005 9:01 AM PDT
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[n/a] Goad @ | 14-Apr-05/3:39 PM | Reply
I have a question for you: did she 10 every single one of your pomes the instant it appeared? And did that like totally turn you off?

That would turn me off so hard that by the tenth ten I doubt I would even be able to make eye contact any more.

That said, this is pretty decent pome, even though I'm a rabid anti-smoker. Though I do occasionally imbibe smoke in it's more expensive liquid form.
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