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Unknown Plains (Free verse) by Twisted Wizard
Lay me down with hateful eyes, Never hear my dying cries. My soul it rises from my bloody corpse, To unknown plains it shall go forth. In the midst of falling, voices are calling, Pulling my soul in either direction. This hopeless struggle ends in right, It was then that I thought that I saw the light. Upon arrival I am everything but welcome, Hateful eyes of holy figures cast gazes of utter disgust upon me. Banished from this bitter sanctuary, this wrongful place, I am sent into a downward spiral, which I now must face. Falling forever I know not what to do, For, for me the light was not so true. Reaching the end I hear the voices, Voices of evil figures that too have hateful eyes. Falling to my knees I weep and scream, For I know there is no turning back. In this unholy dream I shall remain, Until my power and breath must be refrained, and my desecrated soul is no more

Up the ladder: Missing Yesterday

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.173913
Weighted score: 4.1887712
Overall Rank: 13241
Posted: April 30, 2002 8:33 PM PDT; Last modified: April 30, 2002 8:33 PM PDT
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Comments:
[9] daniella @ 67.34.28.215 | 7-Jul-02/5:16 AM | Reply
go down in flames but get up, look around you and bring yourself into solid, shining words. i applaud your effort to show/share your sorrow. bring it home and lift it to Him.
[n/a] Twisted Wizard @ | 7-Jul-02/9:50 PM | Reply
why thank you
[6] GAC @ 206.72.46.253 | 8-Jul-02/7:56 AM | Reply
The subject sounds like a nightmare. I pray you'll do what is necessasry to avoid this fate. Also, this is better than freeform. You have many rhymes here. With a little editing this could be really good.
[4] forestchild7 @ 216.77.209.45 | 9-Jul-02/3:06 PM | Reply
ok, let's just say I never want to go to this place, but you did try,
and I'd say you did a good job with wording... *smile* but you
still may want to read some more poetry before you write...
[7] Isis @ 66.13.194.134 | 12-Jul-02/9:52 PM | Reply
I like it.
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