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Occam's Razor (Free verse) by Quarton
Occam's razor, from pen to paper, matter diffused, truncated to vapor. Glanced lasciviously, simply to look, money embezzler becomes a crook. To labor in vain, expressed as try, the blue horizon, merely sky. Current of air, shortened to wind, render null and void, just rescind. Drenching downpour, now only rain, hold in contempt, becomes disdain. Dancing flames, expressed as fire, love's tender passion, but desire. Blanket of white, written as snow, violent tempest, reduced to a blow. Uncontrolled rage, described as mad, crestfallen sorrow, reduced to sad. Unbounded glee, explained as happy, love's melodramatics, akin to sappy. Extreme trepidation, becomes to fear, truly beloved, restated as dear. Arresting a prisoner, is to capture, ecstatic delight, deferred to rapture. Openly detest, gives way to hate, rapidly diminishing, only to abate. All transformed, yielding to changed, orderly placed, is now arranged. Acute sorrow, generalized as sadness, blissful serenity, nothing but gladness. So Occam's Razor, intended to show, brevity of words, the poet's best goal. Yet, too much economy in written verse, may in dullness, poetic musings immerse. So, why not embellish the story a bit, after all, strike down is superior to hit. Wintry gale, surely better than gust, Thus Occam's maxim, not a poetic must.

Up the ladder: The Blood
Down the ladder: hello eternity

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.1666665
Weighted score: 4.7758822
Overall Rank: 11360
Posted: June 10, 2004 5:10 PM PDT; Last modified: June 10, 2004 5:10 PM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] Quarton @ 12.217.221.61 | 10-Jun-04/5:27 PM | Reply
I originally wrote this as a joke and admit it
probably should have been left unposted. I'll do
better next time(:
[4] New Life Drug @ 69.106.238.155 | 10-Jun-04/10:47 PM | Reply
this makes no sense
[7] Doug @ 64.12.116.140 | 11-Jun-04/11:49 AM | Reply
kind cool, almost clever.
[5] nentwined @ 66.92.183.34 | 2-Jul-04/11:51 PM | Reply
cute. a bit wordy, and I know the poem's about one facet of that, but I still didn't want to wade through the whole thing; rhythm's a bit off for me in several places.

If you meant this seriously, and I see that you don't, I'd have to argue that Occam's Razor is only towards the simplest _sufficient_ explanation, and that would apply to the simplifications you make--they're context-dependant, and so it's hard to see whether they're overly-simplified or not in usage. ;)

Points for the blend, though.
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