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Crashing Into Me (Free verse) by emeraldskies

When you're blinded by the past A better future is often overlooked. Convinced yourself to settle for last, Your feelings are never an open book. When you notice the past hurts You finally glimpse a friend Who you can see as more your heart asserts, A friend you have come to love in the end. Quietly watching from a friendly stance, He is hurt by those he cares for. Your heart clenches, begging for that chance With something, for something, like never before. Finally the cries reach a crescendo, He asks you to tell and you waiver. But in the end you say what you can't undo Twisting inside as he tastes this new flavor. You just wait, wait, wait for days on end Praying for something that won't come true. When finally that message he does send, You are paralyzed as he says...I love you too.

<{Baba^Yaga}> 8-Jul-03/7:52 PM
This exposes too much, and you shouldn't because, well, good poetry use that concealment to its advantage, you give too much away here unfortunately. All of these aren't completely hopeless though, they can be reworked. You have to go for the knock out resolve. Read 12673 Jalepeno ave, by Jeremi B. Handrinos, to see what I mean.




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