poemranker ::Replying

ReplyTo a comment on Relief (Ventilation Shaft rewrite) by cyan9.

zodiac9 Dec 2005

Oops. Just realized the red lightning forks are streaking. Well, that's too long anyway, and wandering too far from the sentence's first action. In my edit, change "Forks streaked across" to "Its forks streaked across" or some other word for lightning besides "forks" or "lightning".