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Eternity (Free verse) by Dovina

What shall I do After I die? Newport Shores? A lot with a view? Close to Fashion Island? As in real estate It’s location location location Her condition’s going down I heard them say But the opposite is true Strength and vigor exhausted A good sign Draws a satisfying vision Up to Mt. Nebo I’ll go No earthly Canaan for me Upward, onward!

zodiac 25-Oct-05/2:40 AM
Woo-hoo. Mt Nebo's here in Jordan, you know. Upward, indeed. Everything except "But the opposite is true / Strength and vigor exhausted" is great. Change that to something less totally didactic and wood-tongued. Or drop it altogether. DOVINA: But that line's the whole point! ZODIAC: Exactly.




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