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My back (An explanation) (Free verse) by Stephen Robins
"The swell of a fat back,
Over one's trousers,
Is one of life's great,
Female arousers."
So read the tale in Cosmo,
A cruel, acerbic jest,
Believed by wanton fools,
Seeking to impress.
I ate stewed cheese,
Far beyond the point of repletion,
I now have a back,
Like a hugely obese Frisian.
An alabaster bulge,
Over one's swimming trunks,
A disgusting welt of lipid,
Two preposterous chunks.
If my back had nipples,
It could be milked for a dozen years,
Supplying the world's children:
My wobbly bandoliers.
I was hoping that this poem,
Might prove in some way cathartic,
But by the poems end,
My back's no smaller than the artic.
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