Poemranker [Replying] Thu Nov 21 22:51:00 PST 2024

Replying to a comment on:

Call upon the wrath of god on ye (Other) by Imago

Call upon the wrath of god on ye who see fit to tamper with such purity of that which once lost can not be found for such diseased ticks must be picked and squashed between ones fingers lest they spread their scurge upon that fertil ground for once the soil is soured within all fruit it bare the disease lingers no blooms we see from those deflowered call upon the wrath of god for the wrath of god is truth and it maybe the only cure call upon the wrath of god and the seed you sow may grow and bloom into something that is pure

Sasha

31-Oct-04/7:02 AM

I most strongly disagree with all of you.

"Call upon the wrath of god on ye" Is an excellent bit of mockery of those who have no idea how to sound archaic but try to anyway. "scurge" is a nicely subtle way of shortening the line to the author's specifications in the manner of the great Robert Duncan. The pun on "may be" in the fourth to last line is an example of supreme wit matched only by the uncapitalized god, a most original way of indicating the author's displeasure with religion.

In short, there are few poems better crafted than this.

Thus this poem most certainly merits a score of.....

HAHAH

Gotcha there. Just kidding.

"Call upon the wrath of god on ye" just sounds like an illiterate wanker trying to sound biblical

"scurge" should be scourge

"it maybe" should be "it may be"

Now, since you posted a "correction" I would assume that you would at least fix those utterly guffy fuckups if not delete the whole dribbling amorphous, artless and musicless pseudopoem. However, since you did not, I can only assume that your edit was to get your poem up to the top of the list again and erase the 7 and the 8 you'd gotten (which were really generous)

Before you wonder about it, yes I really do mean it. Please, try again. On second thought, don't!

-10 of shame-

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