I was an actor once For all you know I still am Keanu taught me all I know I know that if you talk Talk slow and deliberate In a surfer accent Whatever the role You will succeed In scrounging at the bottom But at least you never lose hope that Someday, a day long from now Those famous words "I know kung-fu" Then riches to more riches! The flock shall come And they will praise you! What skill! What grace! But it will all end... Oh! And how it will end! Larry Fishburne will spurn Carrie Anne will plan your demise and The special effect The ultimate special effect That is your life Will slide back into its DVD case And find it final resting place Next to a copy Of Bill and Ted's: Enormously Mind-Numbing Adventure And you shall be happy And you shall be free