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No Sunday Clothes (Free verse) by wilco

A question, God, if you have time. And if you don't, well that's just fine. I'd like to know, if you don't mind, just how can you be so very unkind? I see these people from day to day, who have nothing and give it away. They turn the pages every night, and never see your shining light. Some have terrible, terrible scars, from loss and death and pain and wars. And some have voices in their head. Some, it seems, are better off dead. Still they paint your bearded visage, and that of your son, made in your image. So what do they get for their bottomless faith, but hunger and poverty...murder and rape? I do not ask for myself, you see for I have all that I'll ever need. Which confuses me that much more, I suppose. Because I need no Sunday clothes.

zodiac 6-Mar-04/9:33 AM
Make this poem talk to almost anybody but God. For one thing, do you think God is going to answer you? For another, do you think He's going to answer you when you speak to Him in that tone of voice? You don't even capitalise His Holy Pronouns!

If you changed this poem so that the first line was:
"I questioned God blah blah blah blah blah," and so on, it would be a 100% improvement. Oh, and make it really rhyme if you're going to use rhyme! Oh, and find some original words to rhyme! That's a difficult thing to ask, because it means reading a bunch of poems and seeing what words they rhyme. You could start by reading all the so-called rhyming poems on this site and avoiding anything they do like the proverbial plague.

More?




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