(Nentwined, please put Ghazals in the style category too) (Not that this's a ghazal, I'm just saying, well, you know) 1. Occasionally I'll piss right into the shower before I get in, almost always, actually. 2. I have masturbated to everyone I know twice in a shower at some point in time during my life, and left the cum-hair balls of approval right there in the drain to mark the sacred event. 3. I always give myself a proper finger check in my ass to make sure all's well that ends well in the ol' rear doorsky, and have even gotten in three and a small bottle of shampoo once, If my memory serves me correctly. Which it always does. 4. On at least a dozen occassions I have shit in the shower, and when it wasn't runny enough, I have toe helped it down the drain (this is very difficult if the cum-hair ball has been deposited first). 5. For some reason I have fucked very few people in the shower? I once, did however, have this client that would pay me 500.00$ an hour to take a shower with him and piss on his leg several times during the shower (he was a coke head queer that owned a catering comp. he was also a black guy and well endowed), but the trick was holding the piss back to about five minutes of sporadic splurts. Now that would make him cum quick everytime, and I would get out of there in ten minutes with the same amount of money. 6. Finger fuck my ass while I jerk off (left handed if I'm fucking a foreignor, or a man {visually}, remember I never actually have had alot of penetration outside of myself in the shower). 7. Died of a heroin overdose in a shower. Collapsing my lung and splitting my lip in half. I survived obviously, though I was in a great deal of pain for quite a while, thank god I was a junky. I didn't feel a thing. 8. Have sung some emmy worthy ballads in a few, and written some of my best material. 9. Rarely ever brush my teeth in showers. I do hands down favor showers over baths any day to be honest. Unless vanilla bath salts are involved, and accupressure, or blood letting. 10. Very rarely shave in the shower. 11. Use strangers showers 80% more than my own. 12. Pay someone to clean mine.