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A twisted Trail in Eden’s Garden (Free verse) by Dovina

Sin is crouching at your door— she heard it said to Cain. His mother, Eve, remembers well the day she sat there crouching, halfway through a tasty sin. Suckered, sold and saddened, by verdict, vouched and valid, she lingered just for one last treat, sweet sensation, lone indulgence before the exit, slam and lock, thorns and sweat outside the gate.

amanda_dcosta 18-May-07/5:38 AM
Hmmm.. lemme see. Quite a few points came to mind when I read this. First of all, I like the theme. Secondly, I like the similar syllables used like... suckered, sold and saddened... and verdict, vouched and valid. Thirdly... its very good imagery you've pictured there at the end, ie. the last two lines. Very emphatic. Good work.




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