She was always the one to point Me, in the right direction, but pianos fall on all kinds of people You can't really predict such things I mean, who in the fuck jogs at 8 in the morning anyway? You know, I don't know, I mean yeah, I took flowers to her mom and everything But ah, I'm emotionally unavailable, I can't seem to find the time to masturbate these days let alone, even eat, so fuck jogging, that's her fault. What you want more? Maybe a BBQ Everybody likes fish well, I mean, plastic fish like bowled fruit And all the Chiquita banana chicks are there And they're swinging their hips back and forth And they're singing the Chiquita banana song I'm running around, I'm like five I have a pet grasshopper, and a praying mantis with dental floss tied to its leg from my bunk bed Everything is trunked and hidden away Like photographs that have been burned and sort of ashed into piles Bones, dinosaurs, anthropologists Orangutans, even orangutans stick their fingers in their asses I don't know, maybe it's some sort of 'Fuck me, fuck you' White dwarf, kind of like a star collapsing Ah, I don't know, I always bit the eraser off my pencil Just, you know, and right when I would bite it, and swallow it (I have all kinds of things in my stomach like hang-nails, gum, and erasers) Then, you know, I would have to use it, but it wouldn't be there, so I would tear holes in the paper I always tear holes in the paper [demented laugh] So the pub was the same it was always like this Sort of Dark, and candle lit I approached my perch like a gargoyle in heat, and I stood there, steadfast, and listened to the woman, I think she might have been a transvestite, but she was still relatively good looking She was talking about the cow that wore the golden lightning charm She said in pastures, Texas pastures it's very common for tornadoes to pick up cows Or God to throw lightning, and strike the beasts dead, but one cow, one cow in particular, stood among the rest higher and prouder (well, he couldn't read like my pet monkey, but he still stood high and proud). And he was able to read the other cow's minds The lightning had changed him So there was this droning stereo sound of 'moo, ma, moo, moo-moo-moo ma-moo-moo-moo-moo' and he stood up eyes bulging from his head and said 'What the fuck! Can't you say anything but moo, fucking moo? What about coo, what about chew, what about fucking ensue, what about slice some fucking chickens up, and forget about this beef festival?' It's all madness, it's all madness, but I like Chris & Pitts... They have good ribs, but the cow, he wore this necklace with the golden lightning pendant on it, and he was the first cow to really step forward, and analyse the whole sound of moo, moo... I don't know, everything was dark and moist between her legs It was a sort of cave, a sort of cave somewhere in Venezuala next to those big fucking waterfalls her name was Maria Rosetta She liked to ride horses naked I don't know why I was lost in her breasts I was lost in the way she would make guacamole It was her hips, well, I outlined my finger, my finger prints, well my whole hand print in ink, and tattooed it on her side kind of like an Indian would mark his horse And I claimed her my Guatemalan maid, and I said 'Listen maria, I'm going to have a real big house one day, and I think you'd be the perfect woman for my Eureka, you naked, my vacuum cleaner, bring some friends, what the fuck, bring all your cousins, I hear they have great weed down there'. http://independentartistscompany.com/kiac/songs.aspx?SongID=1469& ArtistID=9993 Guitar solo