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Better Off Dead (Lyric) by wilco

The paper-airplane smog hanging over my noose sent me into convulsions on the right side of youth. The recycled thoughts coming out of the clouds became movie-script endings and Indian mounds. And it came without warning and some broken bones a losing lottery ticket and reminders of home. Oh, but the winter chill sinks into my bones like Ebbot’s Pond absorbing stones that we’ve thrown. And she rains when her eyes cloud up and she’s saved from how life ends up when you’re all alone. Cigarette smoking in a hundred degrees and a leper sees your heart says “it’s still a disease”. Take away the romance in the end of your days, it’s just a long holiday at the bottom of Fire Lake. So, I’ll wait for the engine to turn off all the lights, become a secondary character and fade out of sight. Oh, but the winter chill sinks into my bones like Ebbot’s Pond absorbing stones that we’ve thrown. And she rains when her eyes cloud up and she’s saved from how life ends up when you’re all alone.

cyan9 9-Dec-05/3:12 AM
zodiac + wilco:

In answer to zodiacs message:

With regards to the "just a general impression" that no serious poet can take to the bank:

I attempt to pull out general points in order to credit the direction someone takes and provide feedback on themes and reasons for the pleasure or otherwise obtained by reading the piece. I didn't realise that this was of little use to people; my intention is to provide a useful critique without being brutal. Is this of no use to people? Is proof-reading closer to what people want and gain from most?

With regards to "poemranker isn't serious poetry":

I would disagree and say that some people can pour their hearts out on the page and for such should be treated with importance rather than by receiving comments like the allpoetry.com favourite "nice write", and should at least be told in a reletively respectful manner why their work succeeded or failed to please. Other people take this less seriously, but I would prefer to ebb on the side of caution.

With regards to "put up or shut up":

Im afraid Im going stoke up the firing line and choose "put up". What would you like and benefit from being put up?

With regards to deleting commentry:
I delete commentry when it gets too long or the piece is completely rewritten and so it is irrelevent usually.





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