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Digging A Grave (Pimple) by Blindpoetry I'm digging my own grave
Sorry if I'm beginning to rant and rave
You just made me really sad
Did you expect me to be glad?
Yes, I am a little mad
Because you lied to me
And that made me feel really bad
The dirt is flying behind me
I'm trying to do the same with this bad memory
The grave is taking out the sad
My heart is soaking it up
Like a stupid Fad
I will now enter this grave
Leaving the dirt up top
I will now enter this grave
Hoping all these mixed feelings will stop...
Up the ladder:
Smelly Scum Child.
Down the ladder:
Surfer
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.571429
Posted: December 19, 2003 8:52 AM PST; Last modified: December 19, 2003 8:52 AM PSTWeighted score: 5.422622 Overall Rank: 3057 Comments:
296 view(s)
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for starters:
1-"I'm trying to do the same with this bad memory" wud b better if u did away with 'with this bad', it kinda drags the idea.
2-"The grave is taking out the sad" i think i understand what you mean - but a little rearranging cud/might make it better
On the whole the piece aint super nor is it bad..enough fr me 2 give u a 10 atleast..
:o) TC