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A Moment (Haiku) by nentwined
With these lines I do entwine you, your mind, a moment in time: velvet wine.

Up the ladder: My Apology
Down the ladder: this meal was knowledge

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 122
.. 07
.. 01
.. 28
.. 41
.. 17
.. 33
.. 00
.. 12
.. 10
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 6.821429
Weighted score: 6.821428
Overall Rank: 366
Posted: March 16, 2002 1:19 AM PST; Last modified: March 16, 2002 1:19 AM PST
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Comments:
[4]... anonymous @ | 7-Jul-01/1:27 AM | Reply
I like the other version better ("a moment in time") MarkB
[4]... anonymous @ | 7-Jul-01/10:02 AM | Reply
oooooh... love this one.... Shar
[n/a] nentwined @ | 16-Mar-02/1:21 AM | Reply
testing :)
[4]... anonymous @ | 16-Oct-01/1:27 AM | Reply
pretty, but you SIN! it's 783- a haiku is 575. you question the gospels, eh? :)
[6] -=SeTTle=- @ | 11-May-02/9:29 PM | Reply
For some reason this poem seemed really...fast..not short so much but...it flowed fast....not well, not badly either, but it seemed really decisive, almost curt.
[6] Amelia @ 198.146.136.22 | 9-Jul-02/9:29 AM | Reply
The last line is not exactly a line but still I like it.
[2] Robert K Foster @ 209.68.71.126 | 20-Jun-03/8:37 AM | Reply
too many syllables.Nice, but too many syllables.
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