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You can go no further. (Free verse) by Dovina
A vanishing point— where edges of the road you’re traveling meet and from which you can go no further. Measure the angle edge to edge, and the distance between, then figure how far you can go to where you can go no further. The higher your eye from the road, the smaller the angle, and the farther to the vanishing point. You can go no further. Clearness of air or thought help none to extend the distance. Even to the blind, the vanishing point does not draw near, and you can go no further. Another eye goes overhead, offers another view. Ask that person how far it is to the vanishing point and whether or not you can go no further.

Down the ladder: Magnetic Time

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.8
Weighted score: 5.2145653
Overall Rank: 4387
Posted: May 9, 2006 2:04 PM PDT; Last modified: May 9, 2006 2:04 PM PDT
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Comments:
[8] Niphredil @ 132.69.238.35 | 9-May-06/2:24 PM | Reply
Oh, nice :-) Must have been the geometry that makes your poem so alluring at this hour.

Don't you think it might make the ending more poignant if you were to change the negative last line to a positive one - something like "whether or not you could go any further"? The comparison would strengthen the message.
[9] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 | 10-May-06/1:58 PM | Reply
Great! This is probably one of your best (although I can't claim to have read even half of the poems you've posted on here...most done while I was away and there's a lot for me to catch up on...) and I can't really think of anything intelligent to suggest. My brain's been fried by essays. Although, having spent some time dealing with Xeno's paradoxes I had this strange longing for some arrow imagery in here; it would fit with the angle and also with the idea of distance.
[n/a] Dovina @ 70.38.78.229 > Ranger | 11-May-06/4:32 PM | Reply
I am almost always amazed when someone says that a poem is my best, or one of my best. Not that I mind hearing it, but it’s usually something I threw together. My masterpieces seem to languor in everyone’s mind but mine. Still, thanks for the comment.

Zeno’s arrow is an interesting comparison. That paradox is about motion being really rest, while mine is about infinite distance being really finite. Mine is based on the perception of distance from a viewpoint near the ground. In both Zeno’s arrow and my road, the paradox can be eliminated from a more encompassing point of view.

I was trying to get at the idea of narrowly defined geometry and how a science of distance can stem from an observer’s false common sense. I hope the ridiculousness of the narrator’s conclusions can also be seen pointing to other false conclusions drawn from wrong points of view.

Thanks for your comment.
[9] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 > Dovina | 12-May-06/5:39 AM | Reply
Well, as I say, I haven't read even half of your stuff on here. Even so, this is one of the best of those which I have read. I understand about the masterpieces being unrecognised though...my turncoat poem was supposed to be my seminal work, which I will never better, but it didn't meet with the same attitude. But then, that's what public reading is for.
[8] wilco @ 24.92.74.122 | 11-May-06/4:01 PM | Reply
What's this about the demise of the Ranker? I know I've been away, but that's no reason to close up shop ;)

[n/a] Dovina @ 70.38.78.229 > wilco | 11-May-06/4:34 PM | Reply
Oh, we just can't get along without you, wilco. Please come back. And bring only the good guys with you.
[9] amanda_dcosta @ 203.145.159.44 | 12-May-06/12:20 PM | Reply
A very interesting piece, quite to my liking.

Dovina, I really admire the way you have your poems ready, one after the other, and am sorry to say that I haven't given much of them their due credit. Wish I had more time. Am awfully busy. Shifting next week.
I read this a couple of days ago and reminded my self to come back to it. I like it.
[n/a] Dovina @ 70.38.78.229 > amanda_dcosta | 12-May-06/12:31 PM | Reply
Thanks Amanda. I’ve become discouraged with poemranker lately, and have not posted as regularly as I did. That’s not your or Ranger’s fault. Especially Ranger; he’s been there commenting on almost every poem. But the other regulars are mostly gone. Maybe I should just trudge ahead anyway. I keep writing poems, but just hold onto them, hoping for change.
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