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Oh Merry Fay (part 1) (Lyric) by ALChemy There along the Filigree.
Where silver tides the
Yeomangown.
That, that will and that, that be.
Are dressed both in a
fellow down.
So daâce with me Oh
Merry Fay and dally
us our merry way.
While the Daladia ladies play
There holymn songs to Plato
Flarny are the men at Gar
who chank their teeth
at Filigreemen
and yank their hair and vank for war.
They are a millanteenth
angry men.
So daâce with me
Merry Fay and dally
us our merry way.
For I shall sail Gelal today
and I may die at sea.
The Garmen come.
They want us gone.
The Terramornge
will soon succumb
and The Earl of Orange
has turned and run
into the hills of Galveron
The odds are snarred
for we are so few.
Weâre farming men not army men.
Theyâre numbers large.
More than we knew
had ever marched this girthly span.
So daâce with me my
Merry Fay and dally
us our merry way
and pray we can keep them at bay.
Till the Platonians ally.
Up the ladder:
Hollywierd
Down the ladder:
My heart had a war...no body won
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.125
Posted: December 12, 2005 8:21 PM PST; Last modified: December 12, 2005 8:55 PM PSTWeighted score: 5.5715003 Overall Rank: 2427 Comments:
Yeah I kinda just rushed through with the punctuation.
Thank ya Lil Lady.
I admit...I am not the English marm! So you'd better double check what I tell you as far as punctuation goes...it is my weak point!
Am I missing what the original song was?
The title says it all. It's about trying to find happiness while knowing you're doomed to die soon and how crazy it makes you.
Can you see any of the hidden WWII references?
Yes. But I'm still getting Irish, mostly.
Yeah, that seems to be a recurring quality in my lyrics. I too have Irish blood but nobody I know in my family has an Irish accent. I must be trying to get in touch with my roots or something.
You know, sometimes when I read this I hear it to the music of "Thank God I'm a Country Boy".
This reads like a Mondegreen, I don't know of what.
On the surface it's, um, entrancing. As far as punctuation, drop the periods at the ends of lines 1, 3, 4, s2line3, s4line3, s7line4. Add periods s2line5 and s5line7. You might also consider a comma at the end of s2line3, s3line4, s4line3. Other than that, I'm afraid to comment, though I feel like you might have meant "snared" instead of "snarred", "Their" instead of "They're" in the same stanza, and another word besides "girthly". But who am I to say? 8th generation Irish-American, that's what.
Jabberwocky. The idea was to convey a story while filling it with words that don't exist. Most of those words do imply certain things though.
Sorry about the punctuation and some of the grammar. I actually intended "They're". "They are numbers large" Just sounded more like what the strange talking narrator would say.
Oh. Cool. Reading it with Jabberwocky in mind, I can see where you got the rhythm, rhyme, and a lot of the structure. Odd that I didn't see it until I was told, though. Extra points for that.
Why must you entertain us with such lyrical,but unintelligible talk? Can you not speak Ordinary sometimes? Iget only inklings of what you mean.
It amazes me how many of my poems you get without even knowing you get it.
Are you saying that because I have no clue what you are saying that I get it?
pretty much.
Of course, youre kidding. You don't just write with no direction, absolutely no clue?
Why not Lewis Carrol did.
Be serious. I'm studious, non-frivilous, impatient-with-levity person who wants an honest answer.
Have you ever read Jabberwocky?
http://www.jabberwocky.com/carroll/jabbe As stated in above comments it's about writing a story using a lot of invented words and yet still tying together something like a story. The idea is that the reader uses their own imagination with the made up words and in doing so takes the poem to a personal level that the poet could not normally achieve.
ok, that's a better answer. All I personally ask, and it may be too much to ask, is that a shred of comonly understood language prevail.
I had no idea that you wanted poetry on a silver platter. My apologies.
The finer and more elegant the better. I prefer diamonds on the platter.
See if you can get -=D_A=-,P.I., to talk about Carroll. You know he taught 'Maths' at their college, Oxford.
If anyone knows how to Jabberwock it's him.
This is the best Lewis Carroll poeme:
And what mean all these mysteries to me Whose life is full of indices and surds? x² + 7x + 53 = 11/3
He was sort of the Andy Kaufman of literature wasn't he.
Maybe we can get Humpty Dumpty to explain some of our poems to Dovina.
I doubt that if all the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put old Humpty right that he'd be much use in your noble, but British-like, cause.
Do you have any favorite photos by Carroll?
cute jabberwock, but didn't hold me.
Beautiful! Anyway, who's the one who is going to die soon, and who is this character going crazy that he is of such inspiration to you. Just curious.
His name was Humbert Dumpledy. He sadly died in a fall off the castle wall during a brave attack on the Gar. :)
Yep, I get it! hmmmmm :-)
Heh. Jabberwock was the first thing that came to mind. Very nice :-)
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Filigree.(,)~
That, that will and that, that be.(,)
Are dressed both in a
fellow down.~
angry men.> I would change to better the rythm/flow right there.~
Plato(.)~
turned and runned> (an') would flow better and follow the language used. (runned? >and ran? to run?)
Galveron(.)
for we are so few (too few? we're?)
large. (,)
girthly span.(kinda awkward right there, interupted the flow. ?shorten it, change?)