| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
Bread and blackthorns (Free verse) by Caducus Her feast on the shivering table
sickened me,
like swine on Moslem tongue.
The dew of grief
from sill of souls
sickened me,
like broken bread on Roman tongue.
Imprisoned from my ribs
my heart found love,
It sickened me
like Eve on Adams tongue.
Slice the loaf for wine.
Strip the stems of roses,
crown me with its blackthorns
and watch my scalp weep
for my eyes shall not.
I am not your sacrifice
Just the worst kind of Martyrâ¦..
Unremembered.
Alive.
Yet dead to only you.
Up the ladder:
THE HIT
Down the ladder:
happiness prescribed
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Posted: November 14, 2005 9:37 AM PST; Last modified: November 14, 2005 9:37 AM PSTWeighted score: 5.119203 Overall Rank: 5833 Comments:
A Right Brain cannot get this I know, but reading your poems quickens the synapses, releasing the fluids, like squeezing blood out of silicone. Never change your style, only grammar sometimes and maybe the occasional hint of logic.
Yes, you would believe there are right-brains and left-brains and you're on the side of Good.
Of course.
Do you remember a recent exchange about "labelling" or are you somehow unhinged?
To say Caducus is Right-brained is to say that he leans toward the artistic side of his brain, favoring it over the logical side. It's not the same as catagorizing to the extent of prejudice. We use labels all the time, it's part of language.
I was referring to your comment "A Right Brain cannot get this I know", which is surely directed at me. You'll deny. I won't care.
- Oh, almost forgot your gift:
HISTORY Jennifer Michael Hecht Even Eve, the only soul in all of time to never have to wait for love, must have leaned some sleepless nights alone against the garden wall and wailed, cold, stupified, and wild and wished to trade-in all of Eden to have but been a child. In fact I gather that is why she leapt and fell from grace, that she might have a story of herself to tell in some other place. 272 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
I'm sure you have an explanation why you used "from" rather than "in" or "by". I'll save you the trouble. It doesn't work.