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Love that's not true or double-sided (Free verse) by fevriere

Kinky crime that tricks and treats and never tries too hard runs underground electric, inspires dandelions in my wrists and eyes this paper phase, breeze-waltzing on my grave, fever-pleased and mortally diseased flies, and slowly leaves.

zodiac 8-Feb-04/8:44 AM
There should be punctuation after hard (a comma, probably) and eyes (a dash, comma, or semicolon). You might change the comma after flies to a dash. Great.




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