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Thunderbird and Maledict (Free verse) by Don-Quixote

On dayspring my roots did not clutch life. It was then that I sprouted into desolation and compost. I was a tiny fetus, dejected and algophobic. A mothers gift to her son. Light did not compel me to sprout when I was expelled from her womb: a thunderbird turned inward and huddled within an iron shell, peeking through my spyhole, profoundly vigil. On dayspring my spirit was birthed a stillborn.

-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 19-Sep-03/4:38 PM
[_] AABB rhyming scheme
[_] About romantic love
[_] About poetry-writing
[_] About suicide or self-mutilation
[X] Arbitrary indentation
[X] Arbitrary line breaks
[_] Autobiographical but in the third person
[X] Clerical errors
[X] Cliched imagery (staring out of window, pits of despair)
[_] Cliched rhymes (love/above etc.)
[X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments
[X] Devoid of rhyme
[_] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices
[_] Devoid of wond'rous or fantastical imagery
[_] Drug references
[_] Elves, unicorns, etc.
[_] Exclamation points used to mark 'the funny bits'
[_] Insipidly whimsical or zany
[_] Leaving rant
[_] Lower case only
[X] Melodramatic
[_] Naively religious or superstitious
[_] Obsessed with femininity
[_] Overabundance of ellipses
[X] Overuse of 'depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness, etc)
[_] Pointedly unanswered questions
[_] Protagonist has a smug name
[_] Rage against the machine
[_] References to the author's 'social life'
[_] Repetition of a single word or phrase to the point of nausea
[_] Sanctimoniously moral
[_] Sentimental
[X] Self-pity
[X] Thesaurophilia
[_] Use of internet shorthand or emoticons
[_] Vicarious wish fulfilment




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