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The Better of the Sea (Free verse) by abecedarian

Diesel fumes had weeks ago given way to an imposed and permanent silent drifting whose own mephitic lullabye repels all surprise. I slept bell after bell Rope after rope Fish after fish In my dirty cotton hammock Twelve knots of repair Mark my time away from home My boredom often permits a daydream where those same knots are no longer in my hammock but under the waters surface being dragged in our wake But by St. Osmund's testicles tonight that hammock got the better of the sea - knots undone, it dropped my rusting ass to the deck! And now as I look out over the water I swear I feel a breeze

SupremeDreamer 21-Aug-03/4:21 AM
nice work.. just one thing bugs me:

Whose cradling caring grip

take the word caring and toss it into a trashcan.. its useless filler.. that makes the line weak.. it made my eyes sore..

blessed with nine




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