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The Grave (thanks to z) (Free verse) by Mr Pig

Salt falls on veneer Veiled in pauper’s wood, The clock-watching chaplain sweats As I refuse to leave you. Staring at your headstone, Looking at its immortalized syntax Chosen at random by your rushed mother Who coped when I faltered. It’s quiet here, and fragrant colors are riot near. At least you’re under the willow You liked the thought of it weeping above you And all I can say, in predictable cliche, Is, God, how much I love you. I stare at the topaz clouds, damasking heaven's constant eye, Wondering as I'm watching you If you are watching I. For now, I want to believe-- People always do, when they grieve. Your epitaph, emblazoned in appropriate Catholicism: Words describing an everyman. It doesn’t matter to me, For you are inscribed on my soul.

<~> 19-Aug-03/5:28 PM
i like this very much, pig. some lovely moments, here.
favorites:

its immortalized syntax

fragrant colors are riot

And all I can say, in predictable cliche,
Is, God, how much I love you

topaz clouds,
damasking heaven's constant eye [oops--you need an apostrophe in heaven's]

emblazoned in appropriate Catholicism

the only part i am so/so on is "For you are inscribed on my soul." agh. whenever someone brings up 'soul' in a love and loss poem, it sounds cliched. unless handled with delicate mastery. i dare not do it myself for another 3 decades. think of all that i must learn and unlearn before i turn that phrase! and besides, you deftly dispensed with cliche in the preceding stanzas. so, what can you do about it?

i don't know.

beautiful work, pig.





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