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Pencil Dust [revised] (Free verse) by SupremeDreamer

The tune of sorrow speaks of tomorrow in a lampshade casting light on a dark empty street. The sign of defeat painted on the feet of a beggar. His brown coat floats over worn boots; the roots of poverty. His footsteps speak a tale of pale bones that lie lonely in the middle of the road. A young fool goads the old man to a duel of words hung on the cords of electricity hanging across the globe. Beneath the old man's robe is a pen, rusty and covered in a layer of dust. The young man's pocket held a pencil stolen from the school repository.

Caducus 11-Aug-03/2:05 AM
With exception to stanza 1 I thought this was well written. I've seen all the comments below about you being lazy lately but there are some vivid touches in this poem (stza 2/3/5 particularly).

One thing I have learned (you may have the same problem) writers need to be selfish, I suffer from being thoughtful but will NEVER leave a poem half way through if my gal asks me something.

No one it seems understands us, heres your 8




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