Replying to a comment on:

Bearings (Free verse) by emilyowey

Send me a breath to stand on. Give me a healing nod. Hand me anything to grasp to see, Anything that’s real. I’m standing in this minute, Spinning up and down. Show me my direction, I know not where to go. I know not where I’m looking, I know not what I am. Please send me a vapor, a mist, a breeze So I can know who I am.

richa 3-Aug-03/11:20 AM
Not sure you have a breath to stand on.

Anything thats real is an irritating modern day cliche.

Like the bit leading up to show me my direction and the penultimate line although the final line is a bit of a damp squib.

Not bad though




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001