-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.19 Jul 2002

As a user, I'd like to comment on your poeme, powerline! (a) 'devine' should be 'divine' (b) you said work AND toil... that's a bit redundant, don't you think? toil means work. (c) who writes in pen and OIL? (d) I suggest: "who toil and think / in pen and ink" (e) I can't get the rhythm with the last two lines. It feels as if line 5 should be removed, but then it wouldn't make sense. Perhaps replace the last two lines with: "to inspire new believers" or something.