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flight (Free verse) by soccer23

the small, bruised bird cries deep within. thru bars of hate, and perched on sin. she dreams of endless bright blue sky. to breathe, to see, to live, to fly. her beak sewn shut her wings useless inside the cage an ugly mess. but in her heart a song she sings. and hope this song will one day bring. so through the neverending night the tiny bird dreams of taking flight. to places new, and left unseen. because to the small bruised bird its just a dream.

Quarton 3-Dec-02/3:55 PM
A sad little poem but I liked it. It does need editing as there is a bit of redundancy and some words that are unnecessary. One example:

Bright blue sky deleted so it reads:

She dreams of endless sky. This is minor but so much better IMO. Bright and blue distract from what is a lovely and meaningful sentence. Good luck.




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