Rex Karrs14 Oct 2002

Nice work Zinny! Perhpas your most sensual yet, in the literary sense. BUT... Kindling is the beginings, right? the small pieces that fuel the bonfire? And the beginings of sensuality are all about hints and innuendo. All this to say, don't be so obvious in using the word FIRE three times... What is it that Pops and Hisses? The fireplace? The Oak, the Maple ? The last of the Cherry from some forgotten Orchard? The Sapling pine not yet aged and hard?. Leave "Built Fire" - it works there, because you leave out the article "a" so it defines a very different thing you've created. So maybe he says "The Flame does this to us." I dunno.